Shift Happens: 10 Ways to Transform Sadness

And now for a brief interruption in our regularly scheduled fruit and veggie programming...

For those of you who "get" the creative process, you'll understand that you just gotta go with it when inspiration strikes. And it struck this morning like a spunky little slap in the face! So, I'm gonna get personal here. You've been warned. If you can't handle that, please see this post instead. It's about apple crisp.

OK, so if you're still reading, you can deal. Here's the scoop...I recently (as in this week) went through something that shook me up. Normally, I tend to take things in stride for the most part, making the best out of hard situations. But this had me crying. Yeah, it was over a guy. Boo Hoo.

Anyway, this morning I decided that I needed to get pro-active. I can't take feeling bad for too long without wanting to change my own state of mind and feel better. That said, part of what I decided was that it's OK - even helpful - to cry when I feel sad. Like the 70s song goes: "It's all right to cry, crying gets the sad out of you. It's all right to cry - it might make you feel better!" By the way, "Free to be You and Me" is a great Netflix choice if you want some nostalgia.

So, I sat in my car and cried, journaled, and listened to really loud bluegrass music (it's relevant). And by the time I was done, I had a strategic plan for healing my sadness. And I felt a whole lot better. Up until today, I hadn't really clarified to myself that I really do need to heal. I thought it might just go away. But it feels a lot better knowing that every day, I'm taking steps to shift from sadness to renewed happiness. So, what did I journal? You'll have to stalk me and steal my purse to find out. But I will share the highlights.

Here we go...

How to Transform Sadness and Shift into Joy:

1. If the feeling to "let it out" comes up, then cry. Just let it out. Tell yourself that it's actually mature to cry like a little girl - you're not being a baby, you're being real, healthy, and conscious.

2. Do you have a wise, kind friend who always says the right thing? I sure hope so. Because I feel incredibly grateful for mine. One of my girlfriends said to me (after I told her I didn't want to burden her with my problems) that "part of why we're friends is so we can always support each other, in good times and bad." And that she knew I would be there for her if she needed it, which is true. (I love you, Jennie!)

3. OK, I stole this from "Eat, Pray, Love." But it's fabulous and SO powerful! And I took it one step further. Whenever I feel sad, I send myself love and light. It may sound woo-woo, but I gotta tell you - it feels really good, like a fuzzy love blanket. And after that, I send the other person love and light as well.

4. Journal. That sh*t is amaaazing. If you don't already, I really do recommend it. It will help you immensely to gain clarity and make positive choices.

5. Love yourself. Tell yourself sweet nothings. Know that you are beautiful and lovable exactly as you are.

6. Be thankful for the beautiful lessons that you will inevitably get out of this challenging experience. Gratitude is the #1 way to make powerful, rapid shifts. I bolded that for a reason. It's that important.

7. Affirm something along the lines of: "I am open to a shift into joy. I allow a complete healing."

8. Visualize yourself as a healed, happy individual. Don't worry about "how" it's going to happen. Just KNOW that if you visualize it, it really will come about. It can't not.

9. Find your own inner core of bliss, peace, and love. And the best way I've found to do this is to meditate. For tips on meditating, you can refer to this blog post or check out either of my books.

10. Take notice when shift happens. Did you wake up feeling happy? Did you get inspired to start a new exercise program? Those are signs of healing. What you focus on is what will expand. So pay attention to the progress you're making...and you'll get more and more of it!

I hope you find these steps very helpful in your own life...and don't feel like you have to be sad to use them! They are wonderful tools to apply in your life, no matter what your current situation.

As my saying (and title of my first book) goes, Radiant Health, INNER WEALTH. We can't have truly ultimate well-being unless we have both physical health as well as wellness within ourselves.
Love! xxxooo


  1. Love you, Tess! Making me think of something I read by Susan Piver, a Shambala Buddhist, who wrote "The Wisdom of a Broken Heart"(fantastic book):

    "To be a spiritual warrior means to develop a special kind of courage, one that is innately intelligent, gentle, and fearless. Spiritual warriors can still be frightened, but even so they are courageous enough to taste suffering, to relate clearly to their fundamental fear, and to draw out without evasion the lessons from difficulties. As Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche tells us, becoming a warrior means that 'we can trade our small-minded struggle for security for a much vaster vision, one of fearlessness, openness, and genuine heroism…' To enter the transforming field of that much vaster vision is to learn how to be at home in change, and how to make impermanence our friend."

  2. Tess, how did you know I needed this? Love you and thanks.

  3. Court, thanks so much for that! It really hit home.
    Court & Sherrie: Love you too! You are both such bright shining lights. Xoxo

  4. so I DID miss this somehow (??) anyway THANKS BUNCHES for your insight and willingness to share is not good without the other. I also love you! :-) xoxo

  5. Fantastic Post... perfect for me to read during my time of transition and growth! LOVE this tip - "Gratitude is the #1 way to make powerful, rapid shifts". And I adore the title "Shift Happens" ... I'm going to put that on a bright pink sticky note on my board. I always remind myself that "this too shall pass" but I love that you can look forward to the SHIFT instead of just moving on with life. I always want the shift! Evolve and go to an even better place after that yucky time. Sending YOU love and light Ms. Tess. : )

  6. May your life be filled with joy! Thanks for another wonderful message.